Sunday, February 20, 2011

What Next??

Not all people are meant to follow, not all people are meant to desire...why not let go of those who want to stop their journeys?

This question is becoming stronger in Nina's mind. What is the right way for her? What is the use of doing any of the things that she aspires to? It is just the beginning of her career, a life full of possibilities and success, only she doesn't love it. But she is too far into this track of life to change it to any other direction.

Now on the brink of another important decision, Nina, stands numbed by her incoherently overwhelming thoughts. She is about to go for higher studies which would further her career in the same lines, but she seems to have lost interest in it. Now the answer might seem simple- "Don't do it if you don't like it"- but she doesn't know what else to do, what she loves, and wants to pursue. On the other hand if she doesn't go for the higher studies, she will be stuck in this same forsaken career track. But her confusion doesn't end here.

Its the meaning of her existence that keeps plaguing her from time to time, with the frequency being increased in recent times. When she looks around at her friends, she sees them having a structure for their life, good job, marriage , settling down; but Nina doesn't want any of these in fact the only reason for her living seems to be to continue to have a career. Since childhood Nina, has been a rather passive observer of life, she did not take a serious look at it ever neither did she take into account that there will be a point of no return. Though possessed of many talents, she never explored any of them much, instead like all kids she ended up being a good student, only for the sake of her ego, even though she hated (and still hates) studying to the core.

Looking back at her life, she sees a blur of nothingness, as if she has been sleepwalking all through her life. Now awaken from her slumber she faces the unbearable pang of reality, the purposelessness of life. There is just no point in continuing. She has no dependents in this world, not even the tiniest and trivial-most phenomenon would be affected with her absence.

The only happiest time of her day is when she is sleeping, oblivious of her existence. Every night after meditating, she steals a glance at the bottle of sleeping drugs by her bed side. She is asking me this one question, I'm sure you would have guessed that she is trying to find a single ray of motive to rescue her....WHAT SHOULD I SAY ????


  1. Nivi: I am just copying one article . Hope it helps and answers some of the questions.

    Killing our dreams: the 3 symptoms (From Paulo Coelho's The pilgrimage )

    The first symptom of the process of our killing our dreams is the lack of time. The busiest people I have known in my life always have time enough to do everything. Those who do nothing are always tired and pay no attention to the little amount of work they are required to do. They complain constantly that the day is too short. The truth is, they are afraid to fight the Good Fight.

    The second symptom of the death of our dreams lies in our certainties. Because we don’t want to see life as a grand adventure, we begin to think of ourselves as wise and fair and correct in asking so little of life. We look beyond the walls of our day-to-day existence, and we hear the sound of lances breaking, we smell the dust and the sweat, and we see the great defeats and the fire in the eyes of the warriors. But we never see the delight, the immense delight in the hearts of those who are engaged in the battle. For them, neither victory nor defeat is important; what’s important is only that they are fighting the Good Fight.

    And, finally, the third symptom of the passing of our dreams is peace. Life becomes a Sunday afternoon; we ask for nothing grand, and we cease to demand anything more than we are willing to give. In that state, we think of ourselves as being mature; we put aside the fantasies of our youth, and we seek personal and professional achievement. We are surprised when people our age say that they still want this or that out of life. But really, deep in our hearts, we know that what has happened is that we have renounced the battle for our dreams – we have refused to fight the Good Fight.

    When we renounce our dreams and find peace, we go through a short period of tranquility. But the dead dreams begin to rot within us and to infect our entire being.

    We become cruel to those around us, and then we begin to direct this cruelty against ourselves. That’s when illnesses and psychoses arise. What we sought to avoid in combat – disappointment and defeat – come upon us because of our cowardice.

    And one day, the dead, spoiled dreams make it difficult to breathe, and we actually seek death. It’s death that frees us from our certainties, from our work, and from that terrible peace of our Sunday afternoons

  2. Nina is like any other individual living on this planet; confused about self and also afraid of failure. There is nothing uncommon in his outlook and attitude towards life. Like everyone she doesn't know what she wants to do.
    First basic answer she has to seek for herself is- "What do i want to do?". Although this question is universal, answer to this question is individual. Everyone has to find answer to this question individually, Don't expect anyone to guide you on this because they can't.
    This life what you see all around is based on KARMA theory. Everything that exists in this world has to do his share of work and at any given point of time you have to do something or the other for your existence. The day you stop doing your work you will cease to exist.
    Next question is how to decide- "what do i want to do?"
    Answer to that is lying around you. Close your eyes and let your mind and heart travel past everything. You will find answer to that. You will definitely find answer to- "What should i do"
    Once you find that answer, let go of fear from within you. Human mind is very coward, Let it go off fear of failure and act in that direction. You will succeed for sure.
    In Nina's case she is very scared and feel mentally low on confidence. Let Nina first develop self confidence that everyone present in this world are for helping her to succeed. She has to develop the belief that everything she does and says will be respected not bullied.
    Act of self-belief is very important. Don't shy away like cowards. Life is indeed unfair but only unfair life can be a good teacher.
    Look at life in that fashion and sun will shine upon Nina.

    Everything apart, Nivi it is a brilliant writeup.

  3. Have to think in different lines...had made up my mind about certain stuff..

  4. I guess this the article on this link justifies it all..