Sunday, February 27, 2011

Sometimes the silence is the loudest cry for help.

A puffed morning as it had been another horrible insomniac night for Rajat. Waiting for his Cab , some people call it as 'Shuttle' also , may be because they believe office is a different world at all . Cab came at its right time and they moved on. He was reading a book 'Invisible patterns' which was about a small boy who remembers a past life. Deep in the thoughts of Harsh, the main character of the story , Rajat looked outside the window on the never tiring traffic and voracious dreams on the road. Suddenly a bike overtook their cab on which a ten years old girl was holding her dady . Rajat smiled at the way she was holding him and she replied rajat with a beautiful innocent smile . Rajat was feeling too good as after many day someone had reverted him a smile and that too a pure smile. They drove ahead as rajat's cab got struck with a Red signal .Again back to the world of his story and melodious music from his ipod , their cab started moving on the road again. Suddenly a huge traffic jam , Rajat's driver peeped outside and asked someone in local language of what happened . The stranger answered "Some accident of a bike" . Listened this , a sudden fear crippled Rajat's body and he opened the door and jumped out of the slow moving cab. With some minor bruises, Rajat relentlessly ran toward the accident spot and trying to make out his way among the gathered crowd. His heart rammed hard against his ribs and in his mind he was reciting "Gayatri Mantra" and constantly praying to god , much more faster than his breathe , about the wellness of that kid if it would be their bike. With shivering hands , he was pushing people away and finally he reached the epicenter of the accident. Unfortunately, it was the same bike but good thing was kid was not hurt. Blood was gushing out from her father's right hand and with his left hand he was holding the kid tightly and softly . She was frantically silent and Rajat could see the trauma in her eyes . Rajat was happy that nothing major had happened but certain thoughts had engulfed his mind. He was thinking of sudden horrification of an angelic smile. Then ambulance came and took that person and kid . Rajat came back where his driver was waiting . Darkness was surrounding his thought process and sitting mutely on the back seat of the cab , he was thinking of the wormholes . He closed his eyes and prayed God to take him through a wormhole so that he could have kept that kid's smile intact.

Silence Previals,
Aditya Deadpan

Wormholes are shortcuts by which you can travel between parallel universes faster than a beam of light would be able to if it has to move through a curved space-time ... A worm can get to the other side of an apple faster by eating his way through it rather than crawling around it.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Athazagoraphobia- Fear of being forgotten or ignored

First of all me make it clear that this narration has nothing to do with the subject line . But it has . Think it of and that's the puzzle of this post.

Its a true story and has happened few hours back .

Morning started with the same magnetic forces sticking me to my bed and alarm was ringing . Night was utterly horrible as Rajat tried some thing wrong in my life for the first time and it turned out to be a big shit . So the morning started with swollen eyes and heavy head . After getting ready for the office, he realized that he was just 2 minutes late for my cab and his phone was also in silent mode(as usual) . he jumped and looked at it . Found that his cab mates had called him and obviously had left. So he started via  public transport . He really loved using public transport because there he found more people to talk with , no office discussion, listening people talking on phones or with each other and understanding their psychology . Reached the bus stand and got a bus for Marathahalli. Bus was utterly butterly full and he was looking at faces all around and recalling the lines of an old song.

All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for their daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow
No tomorrow, no tomorrow

And I find it kinda funny
I find it kinda sad
The dreams in which I'm dying
Are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It's a very, very mad world mad world

                                         Suddenly someone yelled pointing at someone "He picked my valet " and every one started jumping on him. Bus stopped , everyone started getting down in the middle of the road. A 15-20 years boy was found guilty and to his surprise everyone was trying to thrash him. He already had a awful mood  and now all this. He looked at  the face of the pick-pocketer .It looked innocent .By innocent , he meant thatt guy didn't resist even a single slap instead was standing like a numb with tears rolling down his cheeks. Then someone among the crowd shouted "Because of people like these , we are suffering . He will become some minister and eat our taxes and  ....." . That's all. Rajat stepped ahead and told that person "Sir with due respect , look at his face. Do you think he looks like Raja, or yeddurappa or anyone . I understand your anger but he is not responsible of all shit you are talking. You are beating him just because you all are frustrated buggers and you found someone to yell on. Some of you have fights with your wife and someone is frustrated with office but its not fair that you keep on slapping a kid. Take him to police station and that's all. " . Someone from the crowd said "That's the problem you educated I.T people ". Rajat gave him a real bad look and that guy stepped back . But again Rajat looked at that kid with his head down and tears rolling as if he wanted to speak out something via his tears and Rajat was unable to understand the language of his tears. Rajat thought of taking that kid to some shop and wanted him to have some tea or snacks but a traffic police guy came in and took him to the police station .

Rajat was still thinking how that poor kid (Rajat was not justifying his act but He was against public act) .
Rajat standing all alone , just looking at everyone to disperse as if they were there watching some Madari show and now it was over . 

Silence Prevails,
Aditya Dogra

Monday, February 21, 2011

“Insanity - a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.”

Rajat was depressed with his life , the way world treated him and the way he reacted to worldly affairs. He found himself all alone in this crowd .He couldn't find even a single friend who could have really understood him. It might be his own thoughts who made him think in this way . There were people who loved him, they were people who cared for him, there were people who knew that he was doing good . But inside his thought pumping machine , there were thousands tidal waves which were hitting him everyday, every minute, every second. He decided to kill himself , so he jumped from the roof his office's Multi-level car parking. But as murfy's law "Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong" and he landed in the same life he was . But there was a difference. After remaining several days in comma, when he opened his eyes he was completely broken and distressed. He again tried to jump from his hospital room. Seeing his mental conditions, his family and friends with the consultation of the most famous psychiatrist in the city , sent Rajat in the Mental Asylum.

                                     Next day , when rajat woke up , he found himself among some other genre of people. These people laugh together and  cry together, without any reason and with some hypothetical reason . Rajat made several friends in that place who used to tell him several stories which has no starting , no characters, no romance and no ending. Doctors kept giving him Shock treatment and all measures . But deep in his mind Rajat found a better world inside this asylum that outside. Here he had several friends who knew him more than he ever knew about him. They cared for each other, they talked with each other, eat , sleep, dance , sing and do whatever they wanted to do. Rajat's family an well wishers kept visiting him in the asylum but he never met them . He learnt how to fake the world and how to live with friends. He spent his whole life in that asylum , with his friends and his new family .

“The world we see that seems so insane is the result of a belief system that is not working. To perceive the world differently, we must be willing to change our belief system, let the past slip away, expand our sense of now, and dissolve the fear in our minds.”

Silence Prevails,
Aditya Deadpan

Two chambers of my mind : Nothing left on its right and nothing right on its left

This is not a story or a anecdote . Its a confession of a dangerous mind , confession of a virulent mind , confession of my mind.
Starting it with the lines of a beautiful song which is continuously playing both in my laptop and my mind  

"jaage hain der tak, hamen kuchh der sone do 
thodee see rat aur hai, subaah toh hone do 
aadhe adhure khwab jo pure naa ho sake
ek bar phir se nind me woh khwab bone do "

But somewhere the memory has been corrupted and naa tho nind hai naa tho khwab naa hi khwabo ke beejh hai jisse hum bonne de . Sometimes I tried Bhang and sometimes long talks with friends , but something bad happened two days back which is haunting me everywhere. It was lovely Sunday morning . After having a lonely sound-ful night , i woke up again in the same world :-(. I was about to get my daily breakfast i.e corn flakes when i realized that i need to get some sugar from market. Went out and got it. Decided to transfer it first in a jar . While putting it in the jar , small amount fall on the ground. I didn't care for it and went on enjoying my breakfast . After three four hours , when I came to kitchen again I saw ants all around.They were struggling for those small sugar pieces. I , out of my mind , threw water at them . Soon i saw sugar was melted in water and all ants started dying as it was soap water. I tried saving some ants but all died. I sat there only and looked at that , they were hundred in numbers and I killed them all. Now whenever i close my eyes , i see those ants dying . 

I know most of you think what a crapy thought but fact is I killed them all . God ji will make me replay for it , I am not afraid of the punishment but I am just thinking how its going to make those ants alive .They were doing nothing wrong , neither was there eating sugar had any impact on me but why i killed them . 

Silence Prevails,
Aditya Deadpan 

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Death of Nature

This is a diary entry made by me in 2009. Bangalore which always recorded not more than 23 degree was very hot on that day

8th April 2009, Bangalore, Morning 0615 hours, Temperature 32oC

I had always believed that April is a romantic month but today when I went out raging sun and hot air welcomed me. Sun didn't appear charming at all. It was right then I realized that I was standing in the cremation of Nature.

Nature which marked super-cool morning, pleasing afternoon, delightful evening and graveling nights, for a long time now, was leaving this earth to some unknown place, for reasons known to every mute spectator in the crowd here. She was here for quite a long time but her importance was always underestimated by greedy human minds. She was never considered a part of rising, so called evolutionary human civilization.

Today when I saw her, I found her helpless, depressed, battered and assailed by the harsh blows of so called evolutionary civilization. She was giving me deplorable looks, it appeared as if she was scanning past me and asking me queries for which I had no answers. She was mocking at my helpless of not being able to help her out. She looked suppressed under the load of over-ambitious human projects, only to satisfy human thirst.

The deafening roar of evolutionary human civilization was shouting at the top of its voice, trying to justify its existence, its presence, on the basis of false projected dreams, that they can survive without drawing any accord with nature. Humans have created an aura of ego around them, which has made them blind that they can’t even augur their end. Humans have engaged themselves so much in the flashy neon lights, mechanical wonders, cars, malls, that they have forgotten how it feels to be walking beside lake at night, gazing star, feeding hunger with fresh fruits, dancing in the rain, swimming in natural pools, discovering wild nature, straying into jungles and never ending joys in the company of nature.

Quest for money, fame, power and satisfaction of ego have made humans to voluntarily snap off all their ties with nature. Human life may be standing at the acme of their performance but they forget that from the top they are overlooking declivity.

Tomorrow onwards when nature will not be present anymore, we will not have cycle of seasons, we will have no blossoming of flowers, aromatizing of earth, mating of animals in spring, no rain will come down from clouds, no peacock will dance on seeing the clouds, no river will be seen bubbling with energy, no monsoon games will be played, no hot coffee will be served, no snow games will be played in winter, no trees will get new set of leaves, monotonic life will creep in, happy faces will disappear, dark gloomy dismal days will take over. At that moment humans will be left with nothing to satisfy their ego with. Earth once playground for happiness, love, sacrifice will become party to sad, avaricious, egoistic life.

At that moment standing on the verge of extinction and staring at our end fast approaching us, all the sophistication and etiquettes of this civilized society will finally stop haunting our minds and won’t compel us to act consciously anymore. All the masked faces will burn, all hypocrites will run for asylum but no one will be present to see this revival. At that moment even our most audacious, assiduous efforts won’t be respected by aggravated nature. The resonance of conflicting interests between human race and nature will destroy the whole existence of earth leaving no one behind for rebuilding.

Humans have miserably failed to understand the importance of living in perfect accord with nature.

It is only in the mysterious relationships of nature that one can find peace of mind, true happiness. If there is some relationship worth living up to, that is the relationship with altruist nature, where you can cultivate and reap anything selflessly and where you don’t have to hurt anyone. If nature today breaks away from human civilization the whole existence will come falling down. She provides us food, shelter happiness, accompaniment and teaches us love, affection, care, motherhood, family, relationship, kindness, forgiveness and teaches us not to hate, abhor, reject, hurt, harm. If we decide to break our ties with our preservers, then there is no question of our survival.

I don’t know if I will be present tomorrow to witness the sad demise of civilization but I do know it already began today.

What Next??

Not all people are meant to follow, not all people are meant to desire...why not let go of those who want to stop their journeys?

This question is becoming stronger in Nina's mind. What is the right way for her? What is the use of doing any of the things that she aspires to? It is just the beginning of her career, a life full of possibilities and success, only she doesn't love it. But she is too far into this track of life to change it to any other direction.

Now on the brink of another important decision, Nina, stands numbed by her incoherently overwhelming thoughts. She is about to go for higher studies which would further her career in the same lines, but she seems to have lost interest in it. Now the answer might seem simple- "Don't do it if you don't like it"- but she doesn't know what else to do, what she loves, and wants to pursue. On the other hand if she doesn't go for the higher studies, she will be stuck in this same forsaken career track. But her confusion doesn't end here.

Its the meaning of her existence that keeps plaguing her from time to time, with the frequency being increased in recent times. When she looks around at her friends, she sees them having a structure for their life, good job, marriage , settling down; but Nina doesn't want any of these in fact the only reason for her living seems to be to continue to have a career. Since childhood Nina, has been a rather passive observer of life, she did not take a serious look at it ever neither did she take into account that there will be a point of no return. Though possessed of many talents, she never explored any of them much, instead like all kids she ended up being a good student, only for the sake of her ego, even though she hated (and still hates) studying to the core.

Looking back at her life, she sees a blur of nothingness, as if she has been sleepwalking all through her life. Now awaken from her slumber she faces the unbearable pang of reality, the purposelessness of life. There is just no point in continuing. She has no dependents in this world, not even the tiniest and trivial-most phenomenon would be affected with her absence.

The only happiest time of her day is when she is sleeping, oblivious of her existence. Every night after meditating, she steals a glance at the bottle of sleeping drugs by her bed side. She is asking me this one question, I'm sure you would have guessed that she is trying to find a single ray of motive to rescue her....WHAT SHOULD I SAY ????

Friday, February 18, 2011

Resolve or dissolve

"You can be anything you want. Even Superman."

Atul started hating this line and even Superman. According to him 'Superman is dead now, and he also want to die because thats the only way he has left with'.

Sitting under a silent dark sky with thoughts spinning into his head.He was just peeping inside his past . How happy he was and how jolly kind of nature he had , just a year back. 'Life is a bitch' and he had realized it in very short time span . He has always heard our entire life flashes in front of our eyes the second before we die. First of all, that one second isn't a second at all, it stretches on forever, like an ocean of time. Exact one years back ,Atul was awarded by 'Best employee' of his company and it was this day , he met Reena for the first time. She was enjoying party with her friends in the same hotel where Atul's management was patting his back . It was love at first sight . Then the love story started , with each day long night calls and celebrating weekends. Suddenly Atul realized that he had to finish off his official stuff so he started late night shifts in office, spending weekends in office . He thought that after this project , he would purpose Reena for marriage. But it went longer than expected , it took him more than three months to pack up his work. By that time, Reena had adopted herself to live with his absence . Atul came to know this when he proposed her and she , without any hesitations, declined his offer. Atul was shattered and he dumped his body with alcohol and other narcotics for few days. No internet, no phone calls, no friends, no life . He closed himself in a room and kept staring the walls . He , then realized that its been 9 days he had been in office. He took a shower and had his breakfast . As he reached office , his batch was not working . He went to security check and he came to know recession had affected his life too. What ever he used to read in the news paper or in magazines had become a part of him .

He came home and slept for a while .

 Now he is thinking of superman, about reena , about his family , about green grass with his bleeding hand.Life is flashing like splash of water. 

In his diary , he is writing these as his final words "I don't know if there is god or not but i have a firm belief . If there is a God , HE must be following ISLAM. Because HE always enjoying killing us slowly and steadily . Since I am being fired out by all relationships, and God is still not ready to fire me from this life, let me quit "

Question : I dont know . Make it up and answer :-)

Silence Prevails,
Aditya Deadpan 

Sunday, February 13, 2011

One may sometimes tell a lie, but the grimace that accompanies it tells the truth

This inception of this story when Rajat was in the first year of my college. Rajat was one of the freshers who broke down into tears in his ragging not because of beating or because working out but when his seniors used some fowl language (and now Rajat is having patents of several abusive words ;-)). While he looked around his college, he saw seniors doping with several weeds or dumping themselves with alcohol where as few were very serious about studies. Since he had never such culture of doping and drinking , he started hating those class of people . It was in his freshers party , he asked one of his seniors XYZ for some Guru-Mantra.

[ A brief into about XYZ : XYZ was most famous senior from his family (family means state) because he did a lot of job for the college like initiating Cine fest for students, introducing student intervention in the training and placement cell and lot more. But during the ragging , XYZ had asked Rajat to wake him up at 4:30 am in the morning . And as Rajat used to go there for wakeup call, as soon as XYZ used to wake up, he used to start his day with a shot of neat wiskey. So that was a mojor reason why Rajat never liked that guy instead of all good work]
                             As XYZ knew that Rajat never liked those who dope and those who drink, so he said :
"Try to remain in a company of those who drink, who smoke , who dope . I am not saying you should do it . But remember behind everything , there is a reason. Try to understand the reason or problem and then try to find solution of those problems But beware 'keep those solutions in your mind '. Don't become Mother Teresa. The reason i am telling you this is because you will find that about 80% of so called bad souls are not really bad . They are weak , they are less determined and if you peep  inside them you will find reasons for everything(why they are weak , when they lost their determination power). There are 20% of this category who really don't have any reasons for doing it . This approach has two benefits : one you will find that these people are much better than others (not always) and the second is , whenever in your life you face same problem which they had faced, you will know whats the solution and how to come out of the spiral. "

Rajat took it serious . Already he had friends who started doing all these and he became a member of such group. He also became a part of that group , not by being like them but just by listening all their Tech Talks , all their views and visions . And he found that XYZ was right to a large extent . He found better friends in that group than in the elite class of the intellectuals.

Story doesn't stop here :

Rajat had an uncle in his hometown ,whose whole world revolves around his mother. And most important he was considered as an outcast because he used to drink a lot and then scold or beat his family members (infact i never liked his family members as they used to treat his mother with no respect). Last time when Rajat went home, his family in deep distress told him that his uncle mother died. His family was not depressed by his mother's death but by the fact that when his uncle came to know about his mother's death, the first thing he did was, he took a bottle of whiskey and drank it . And then when people came to mourn , he was not in his senses .

After listening the whole episode, that night rajat couldn't sleep because in his mind , his uncle has done nothing wrong. According to Rajat , his uncle was as pious as a temple's priest , as pious as every sane person in this world. After some days , when again his family started the same topic and mentioned that uncle as some satan , rajat got offended because deep in his mind, he could relate his uncle's approach to nothing different than other saints of the world.

Query : Rajat still doesn't find any difference in his uncle's act of drinking alcohol during that trauma event and Rajat's satisfying himself with caffeine shots whenever he gets hit with something expected . Doesn't know whether what he thinks is correct or what this sane world thinks is correct ?? or There's no right, there's no wrong, there's only popular opinion.

Silence Prevails,
Aditya Deadpan    

Saturday, February 12, 2011

The Classroom

NOTE: This blog is inspired from a true incident, still I'll hide the original details, though to most, the places and people may seem familiar.

Just another lazy afternoon in class, in a certain reputed college. And as it is quite common for a college culture to engender a degree of frivolity and freedom in the students, our college was no exception, as a result many students had taken the liberty to skip the class. The teacher however was performing his duty of lecturing the students so that they can fetch the passing grade in the subject, dispassionately.

Suddenly the monotonic environs of the class is interrupted by two knocks on the door. The professor got disconcerted with this unexpected interruption that jolted him out from his soporific rhythm. He answered the door with a hint of confusion and saw a man with sunglasses standing outside. The man was not authorized to be there, he was not a student, a professor nor an employee of any other kind.

The man came directly into the classroom without so much as seeking permission for the act. The professor followed...the man said, facing the entire class, that he had a serious eye ailment which needed surgery, and being unemployed and impoverished, he needed to collect money for it. He claimed that he was an ex-student of a certain other department of the same college. Thus, he elaborated his purpose of being present there, he spoke with a certain tone of urgency and did not appear sycophantic, as is generally the trait of people seeking charity. He asked help from students/teacher/anybody. He also had brought some proof of identification but our protagonist (yes we do have a protagonist :-) , lets call her Nina ) could not see, but she did saw some papers in his hands. One of those was a list of the people who have contributed to the man's cause.

After the man's iteration, some moments of silent apprehension and dubious whispers followed. The teacher tried reasoning with the man about the importance of the lecture he was in the middle of, which needed to be continued, the man too was reasonable and asked people to hurry up with their decisions, as he had other people to see. All the while, Nina wanted to contribute, people had a very popular excuse of not having their purses with them, but Nina did and it had money which she did not need for any immediate reason. But somehow there was an inertia that pulled her back.

This kind of event is quite common within the college campus and on other occasions she does contribute, but that day was different, the teacher and a lot of other people were present and she did not want an act of honest charity to be considered as a spectator sport by everyone.

But she thought, may be the prof would contribute and then she would follow, but to her surprise , that did not happen, not even 1 rupee came out from any one of the pockets of about 40 souls. The man was given a chair to wait outside the class, but he had more value for his time, and perhaps had sensed the futility of his effort, he went away. The lecture resumed.

The classroom was full of young, impressionable and revolutionary minds. Minds which can bend logic in any direction and create miracles...whose eyes well-up after reading Into the Wild, who leave no effort to assure themselves that they will be in-line with the principles of Ranchor Das of 3 Idiots, who even have subscriptions of NGOs and teach the kids at a local slum in the weekends.

What are you thinking?? I can't even formulate a query.

Friday, February 11, 2011

The words printed here are concepts. You must go through the experiences.

Shalu was busy in dreaming dreams when her mother woke her up to get ready as some family was coming to see her for marriage. She was not in a mood to again go back through the same procedural calls . There was something going inside her mind. She had seen some crazy dream and she didn't want to forget that. She got up and wrote in her diary. Quickly she dressed up and her mother did all makeup and fooding arrangements .The other party was quite punctual. After all, the boy had just passed from IMA (Indian Military academy). Family started asking same old question and Shalu kept nodding her head . Then family left her and boy alone to talk for a while . He had good sense of humor with which he kept on answering Shallu's tricky questions in simple terms . Then suddenly something struck into shallu's head . She went inside and brought her diary. She asked that guy to tell her the meaning of her dream , she started reading her diary :

"A snow desert with no vegetation all around .I was sitting on a floating piece of ice and and reading a book . Suddenly i heard some sounds and saw some my childhood friends playing on another floating piece of ice. I called them but they were not able to hear me . and then I woke up "

Boy looked up , raising his temples and after rubbing his head for two minutes and abruptly said 

"Do you really want to know the meaning of the dream Because I don't know the meaning .But i can assure you that I will make sure your friends listen your voice next time when you call them" .

Both looked each other and kept looking with a silence all around and their family members came in.

Question : What do you think, whether shallu had said "Yes" for the boy or "NO" for him ? 

Silence Prevails,
Aditya Deadpan 

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Graveyard Magic

We both are sitting in a graveyard. It is 12 midnight. We talk for sometime.
I get to know that she is not going to accompany me all the time. So in order to
habituate my self for this condition, i start cutting off my self from her partially.
I stand up and started digging a grave. She watches me without saying anything.....

I take all the earth out and keep it adjacent to the grave. It is 3 am dead night. I jump into
the grave and lie down. Now I am able to see her only when she comes in the line-of-sight.
For some time I talk to her as she is in the LOS, but as the sunrise is about
to happen, she also starts moving a little oblique. By the time it is morning 6 am, she is
completely out of sight and has actually moved out of the graveyard compound. I am
still in the grave and feeling a little drowsy now.....

When the sun is fully up, I mean around 9 am in the morning, graveyard incharge guy
comes for regular inspection. While checking he comes to my grave and
to his surprise finds that this particular grave is open. He thinks that due to some
emergency reason the work would have been left unfinished and he finishes up the
remaining work....

All the earth which I had taken out and kept aside comes back into the grave, with me
getting dumped more and more every second....
In few minutes....the grave is closed...
Since then I am inside only. I have died long back.....

The closure of grave marks the end of my connection with her and the world. These layers
of soil on my face are a stark and unending demarcation. My eyes are filled with sand and
everything is so melancholic and hazy………

The Endless Wait : Antaheen

Night  was getting more darker than usual and She was sitting all alone near the memorial of her beloved son. Eight year ago her only son , a young Captain in Indian Army , was killed in Kashmir while fighting for the mother INDIA . Now coming to his grave had become her daily routine but today was special as the whole city was filled with the sounds of crackers and  sky was illuminated with the celebrations of Diwali . And more than that ,today she had many silent visitors who were accompanying her loneliness .These visitors were no one other than frightened dogs running away from the sounds and busyness of the city. After feeding those visitors with some bread and milk, She sat on that broken bench and got engrossed talking to her son .


Question is slightly different , may be completely out of context for some of you folks :

What do you infer from these lines (Other than i am a nut case ;-))
"How happy is the blameless vestal's lot!
The world forgetting, by the world forgot.
Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!
Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd;"

 Dont think in the context of Alexendra pope :-) :-)

Silence Prevails,
Aditya Deadpan 

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Between Worlds

Nina has welcomed the transition from being a college student to a working professional with a lack of excitement and bouts of compulsive urges to quit. But she is not going to quit. You might think its because of practicality, well , that's not the case. She is not quitting because her nature doesn't allow her to...her ego doesn't allow her to.

In the above scenario ego might appear to play a very constructive role, but its not always the case. Many a times she has found her world shredded, owing to her ego. Though, a very sensible person, but at the slightest of pangs on her ego...she becomes enraged and loses all control or civility..the beast within take control in a demonic manner.

The dilemma is, she knows that ego is love of self and love of self leads to happiness but also happiness requires a great deal of tolerance towards other people. But she seems to be at a fix of choosing between these, rather balancing them as they are voluntary.


Wednesday, February 2, 2011

In every adult a child is hidden that wants to play

It was a cloudy day when for the last time Raghu had a fight with Anjali and he , in a childhood rage, returned home . At home, he saw his father's factory workers were helping them in packing their luggage. Upon inquiring, raghu came to know that they were shifting to other town. Before Raghu could go out and tell Anjali last goodbye, it started raining and he had to stay at home. In the morning, they left to the other town. Today again, was a murky day and Raghu's heart was beating at very high rate. It’s because of facebook, Raghu has found Anjali and now after twenty four years, he was again meeting her. Anjali was now a Manager in a big software company and Raghu was running his family business, which was as usual in loss. She had called raghu to the CCD at 5:00pm. Raghu reached earlier and now was eagerly waiting for her. Pondering over various thoughts on how she would treat him after these many years, being a manager in such a big company would she talk with me properly? 

Now it was 5:20pm and raghu was still alone on the table. He was disappointed and was about to get up when Anjali arrived. It didnt take any time for both of them to recognize each other. She felt sorry for reaching late. Before they could start their talk, Anjali's phone rang. It was her Boss and now she was on call explaining him the issues over the phone. While on the call, she gave order for the coffee and drank coffee on the call only. Raghu was just looking here and there as he thought that looking at her while she was busy talking won’t be a good gesture. Once she was done with the call, it was already 6:30pm and she again said sorry to Raghu. She had to leave as she had to drive for a long way and she had some calls at night again. She told Raghu that she would give him a ride, as he was also going in that direction. Raghu agreed and she started driving. Suddenly clouds roared and it started raining heavily. Anjali was driving slowly and they were talking about their childhood days. As it was raining, like cats and dogs, and they had moved out of the busy roads of the town, roads were empty. Suddenly Anjali shouted at Raghu to see something and she pointed towards some street kids dancing in rain on road side. All memories of their childhood started moving in a flashback manner. But before going much backward in the past, Anjali reversed her car. Raghu was unable to understand what she was trying to do. Without uttering a single word, Anjali parked the car near those kids. Removing her high heels and keeping her mobile on the back seat, she jumped out of the car and started dancing with them in the rain. She opened the door for Raghu and dragged him also it. The splash of waters, those rain droplets washed away everything. Both kept wallowing in the rain till it rained.

Moral:  It's never too late to have a happy childhood.

What do you think , which cloudy night had more significance for Raghu : the one which was responsible for  the separation or one which brought them back in his childhood days ??? 

Silence Prevails,
Aditya Deadpan  

Introduction to "An unending vacation"

A huge migration. Refugees of state within the same state. A fade morning in a remote village. A well concrete built house under threat with the inmates having absolutely no inkling of the incoming moments. Highly skewed ratio of populace. Thunderous political turmoil engulfing the minds of the locals, intimidating them, forging new ideologies in the old crucibles. Developing new iconographies and erasing the old ones. Reverberating rebellious slogans in all lanes, by lanes of the territory. Internal rivalries and sporadic parochial disputes adding fuel to the fire. Every morning adding a new dimension to the tactics of guerrilla warfare, which even Guevara may have never dreamt of. This morning is no special with Self styled platoon commanders and their deeply adhering followers setting out to finish the day’s mission to please their satanic GOD.
Talking about the same village mentioned in the very outset, let’s see the scene of today’s morning there. Plan of action indicates that an innocent house and its inmates are going to meet their dooms day today. Execution starts with a knock on the door at 5 in the morning. Knock knock, a heavy knock .A little pause. Again a heavy knock and then every instrument of mannerism is broken down with the commander of band shouting blatantly to send the head of the family downstairs to them. By this time all the curtain should be ripped off for you also, since the inmates themselves have realized the terrifying nature of the condition. Eldest son of Grand Father says “they finally came here also…these Muslims can never be faithful to anyone. Where do we go now”…little folk of the house is still sleeping upstairs, enjoying the charming world of dreams. “Give us the head of family and we will spare you all. we will just have a piece of talk with him” sound is echoing all over. But everyone has fairly understood the nefarious design of the fighters to kill the head in front of whole family .this thought itself is making their Brains malfunction while shivering is getting more and more prominent. Everybody is shouting and trembling at the same time. Any new plans oozing out of the mind are getting again and again distorted by the thought that our own people have betrayed us. “How could He do this to us, I have taught his brother for years” is a repeated broken voice of the second eldest son of the family head. Dadiji is not uttering a word. She has gone into total oblivion. Peeping through the window, bearing the loud shouting of the invaders, looking to the adjoining neighbors houses(which all seem deserted, but are not really), trying to think hard to do something bu her gray matter has already surrendered to function. Mothers are getting hold of their kids. After 7 – 8 hours, everything is normal, perfectly silent, even more than what is required to be in a living house. The house standing tall for decades is dead now. All its inmates have deserted him and left him alone in the inferno to burn.